Thursday, September 30, 2010

Phillipians 1:27

Whatever happens, conduct yourselves in a manner worthy of the gospel of Christ.

I have this problem. My natural personality lends itself to several types of humor. Irony, tongue-in-cheek mockery and supercilious conceit.

I never swear. If just doesn't suit me. You can swear around me if you want. It won't bother me but don't expect me to join in. Once, in 1985, I tried to give someone the finger. It didn't work. I couldn't get my finger to cooperate.

I love to be considered funny, I can keep a room in stitches. I love public speaking as long as humor is appropriate for the event.

Unfortunately, this can also be my biggest area of sin. I can passive aggressively use humor to cover outright insults (although cover is not the right word, I'm sure it is evident to everyone in the room.)

This battle is over my tongue never ends.

BTW: "irony, tongue in cheek mockery and supercilious conceit" was taken from Florence King one of my favorite misanthropes.

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

September 29?

I had a crazy day today. I took a 3 hour nap from 2 pm-5pm that is why I am up at 1:30am.

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

The Slacker is back! (hopefully)

After a long hiatus, I hope to be back here posting regularly.

Today I was reading from Ephesians 6:1-24. This is where Paul talks about putting on the armor of God. The passage is well known, I have heard countless sermons on it, sang songs about it but today I actually read it to see myself in the challenge.

For our struggle is not against flesh and blood but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

Yada Yada Yada. I've read it all before. but then then I read verse 16, "take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one."

So I went back to the beginning and read it all again.

I am a sinner. I know you are too. Some sins are obvious to everyone, some are secret and known only to you. Some are particular to mothers who are protective of their children, or fathers who want to provide for their families.

This summer I watched my daughter be hurt in a deep and painful way. In the end we have found the good in it but it did spark that evil that lies in my heart. Never letting on to her (because after all I am a good mom), I allowed myself to dwell on things and be angry as if it was me that was hurt. I confessed the sin and pleaded with God to be rid of it. I would pretend I was done with it and excuse myself when it would come back. It was like the flaming arrows of the evil one. Shooting them into my heart, bringing back the hurt, anger and vindictive feelings.

Just last week, I finally felt God's peace. I physically could feel the desire fall from me. I have no explanation but God's grace. Was my heart more true when I prayed? I have no idea but I am so thankful to Him for taking this sin from me. I want to wear this shield of faith and fight off these arrows when they come again in some other area "Hasten O Lord to save me, O Lord come quickly to help me. Psalm 70:1-5